It is very important to go over the Basic Agreement Between Members
with your group before you begin. Copies should be given to each member.
When a rule is ignored by one of the members it makes it easy to rectify by saying,
”I am so sorry but as the facilitator I must keep us focused on the rules we agreed to…”
Basic Agreement Between Group Members
- Don’t miss, except for emergencies. A group works because members make the group a priority. Each member must make a commitment to each other.
- Share yourself. Let people know you to the extent you are willing. How you feel and how you look at life matters.
- Listen closely to others. Don’t give advice, counsel or therapy or comment on what others say, but let people know you understand and are trying to appreciate the feeling they are expressing.
- Never argue your point or badger another . Be yourself, be firm, but don’t try to win others over to your viewpoint. People can be different. In fact, differences enhance a group.
- Try to show support to each person in the group. Help people see their strengths and confront them when they are not using their strengths.
- Expressing negative feelings can be helpful. Bottled-up feelings can set up unspoken barriers. Avoid ridicule or attack. Focus on how someone’s behavior in the group affects you and how the situation can be improved. A one-to-one talk can help sometimes.
- Don’t talk about people behind their backs.
- Nothing said leaves the group.
- Take responsibility for the life of the community. Call an absent member. Pray for each other.
Gleaned From “Creating Small Church Communities” 3rd Edition Father Arthur R. Baranowski,